“I traveled fifteen hundred miles to see you
I begged you to want me, but you didn’t want to” Kelly Clarkson

This song is about a woman, where her father left her. I found this part to bring tears to my eyes. Because I traveled 1500 miles and Indra didn’t want me. I begged her to come visit me. I begged her to talk to me on the phone.

All I wanted was to be a father.

All I wanted was to be a dad.

All I wanted was to be a friend to my daughter.

A father should be great. I am viewed as a terrible, worthless father, yet I made an EFFORT. I made an effort to call teachers, call girl scouts, the doctors. Have a meeting with teachers at 7 am before my hearings, to hear how wonderful my daughter is. They all couldn’t understand why Indra wouldn’t talk to me. Then I would explain what happen it all made sense to them.

I am nothing but another person to my kid. I hate it, but its what her mother and her mother’s family wanted. ME GONE.

Funny, I am gone. But Indra is going be 18 soon. I hope and pray she will search me out to find where I am at. Maybe I am going be a teacher at her school? Maybe I am going be so close for to be able drive to my house and meet her sisters and brother.

Scary to think I daughter in High School and one that is turning two all in the same year!!! Wow. I am blessed.

Thank you God, for this path. I know you have a plan.

Advertisements